from hippo to hopper

I received the following from my friend, Joyce. I graduated from high school with her and have just reconnected after all these years. She is relating what happened on a recent trip to Nashville while attending a family funeral. I thought it would give you a smile or two.

My trip to Nashville was as goofy as the rest of my life. I swear that in all truthfulness, I have never had a dull day in my entire life. I got a motel room about an hour south of Nashville. The first night I stayed there, I got into bed with my book and settled down for a good read. For whatever reason, I don't know, I looked up at the ceiling before beginning to read. There was a wallpaper border going around the room at the ceiling.

When I looked up, it seemed like the paper was torn directly over my head. At least it "looked" like it was torn until it moved! I jumped up and put my reading glasses on in order to see it better--the operative word here is--reading. I only see close up with them and needless to say, I couldn't see one foot in front of my face, much less on the ceiling.

I rushed to the bathroom and quickly popped in my contacts, raced back to the bedroom and peered at the ceiling. What greeted me was a four inch long, bright green grasshopper. I ran to the desk, but no one answered, I pulled on my clothes and headed to the office. After telling them my story, they sent a "woman" to help me. She walks in with a dish rag, stands on my bed where I am supposed to sleep and swats at the hopper.

He slides down the wall and lodges behind the picture over the bed. Finally, I convince her to take the picture off the wall, because I really, really, really do not want to wake up in the middle of the night with a grasshopper on my face. We take the picture down, with the hopper perched on the back of the picture, we open the door and she swats him with the dish rag out into the night.

Okay, that was the first night--I slept in the other bed. The next night I am back at the hotel. I am exhausted and eat early, and go to bed early. Upon awakening, I get up, wash my face, put in my contacts, get in the shower, shower, and wash my hair. Get out of the shower, dry my hair, get dressed, put on my make-up, comb my hair, pack my bags and check the clock to see how I am doing time-wise. It was 2:30am! Did I mention that I never have a dull day???